


Remember Me

by Bladezz070



Category: Mass Effect - All Media Types, Mass Effect Trilogy
Genre: Alternate Universe - Human, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Blogging, Depression, F/M, Garrus being a shit, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-10-20
Updated: 2017-10-02
Packaged: 2019-01-08 00:07:37
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,724
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12243252
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Bladezz070/pseuds/Bladezz070
Summary: 11 years since a city wide fire presumably took his husband away, John Shepard of the Aquila police department finds him on a news report from Canada. Unsure what to do and unable to cope in any other way he turns to alcohol and writing. Though not necessarily in that order.A cleaner neater version that was and still is the original Remember Me.





	Remember Me

**Author's Note:**

> This is unbetad. I only had so many days to get it done before AO3 deleted it. Please leave a comment if you see any errors. I know for sure there's at least one that comes from autocorrect. Yes I wrote this on a phone, that's why it's unbetad. I wrote it on the site.

Shepard began his day as he normally did, begrudgingly. His alarm blared in his ear and he took a moment to glare at it and its evil tone. He had to get up, get ready and get his kids ready for school. He slammed his hand on the alarm and managed to knock it off his nightstand. Being a dad was hard. At this point in time _living_ was hard. But he did it, or thought he did.

****

Shepard got up and went to his loving children's rooms. Sean was first. His was the closest. Shepard stood at and banged on the door. It didn't work. He knew it wouldn't. He opened the door and flipped on the light.

****

"Get up lazy bones." Shepard said as he pulled the sheets of his preteen son.

****

"No." Sean grumbled pulling a sheet up and over his head.

****

Shepard sighed. He didn't want to deal with this, but he had no choice. He went to the bathroom. And flipped on the light. He looked for the glass his son uses to rinse his mouth. Once he found it he filled it up with water and walked back to Sean's room. He smiled mischievously.

****

_Wake the fuck up you little shit._ He thought as he poured the water slowly onto his son's face.

****

Sean thrashed around, trapped beneath the covers, as the water was poured on him. Once he was drenched, and the cup emptied, he shot a glare at his dear father.

****

"I told you to wake up." Shepard said.

"I wasn't ready." Sean replied, wiping the water off with his sheet.

"Doesn't matter," Shepard began, "you have to go to school whether you like it or not."

Sean crossed his arms and grumbled to himself. Shepard left and went to Cecily's room, knocking gently he let himself in. Cecily was asleep, tucked in between Iggy the elephant and Georgia the giraffe. He didn't want to wake her up, but they all had places they needed to be.

"Sissy," Shepard talk-whispered as he gently shook her, "time for loopys." The second he mentioned loopys Cecily's eyes blinked open. He chuckled and picked up his little girl.

He carried her downstairs, meeting Sean at the top. Once he was downstairs, he put his daughter down so he could fix all three of them some breakfast. Breakfast was a simple bowl of cereal, fruit loops for Cecily, frosted flakes for Sean and lucky charms for Shepard because if he didn't eat it then it would be throwers away.

Breakfast was finished in what felt like an eternity, but in reality it was about the same time it always was. Shepard laid out Cecily's outfit for her so she could get dressed as he and Sean did the same. Shepard was glad she was finally old enough to dress herself, though she did need help occasionally.

At 7:15 He pulled into the middle school, letting Sean, who wasn't paying any attention to his father but his mp3 player instead, out of the vehicle to go to his miserable school. At 7:45 Shepard pulled into the elementary school. Carefully he helped Cecily out and walked her to her class.

"Bye, daddy." She said with a wave.

Shepard waved back at her and gave a small smile. When she turned around to go to her desk, he left. He went back to his car and sat there for a second, pulling out the cigarettes be kept in the glove compartment when the anger finally got to him. He hated this feeling, the anger appearing out of nowhere and having nothing to blame but despair.

Soon he turned the key and began the drive to the police station. He watched as dark clouds came and went, trying desperately to tell himself that his negative emotions were like those clouds. He didn't believe a word he said. Never did.

Garrus was already inside the station, sitting at his desk playing with a pen and laughing at something Wrex said. Shepard walked up to him. He smiled and crossed his arms.

"Not laughing at my expense are you?" Shepard kept his voice jovial. Garrus had known Shepard for years, since high school. Garrus was there for Shepard, even when he didn't know he needed him.

Garrus was tall, lanky and in some cases annoying. He had dark hair that stood up no matter what kind, or how much, hair gel he used. His skin was average and his eyes tracked like a hawk.

Garrus turned to look at Shepard with a smile plastered on his face. "Of course not, Shepard. We would never laugh at you. Wrex was just telling a story about--"

Richard Jenkins, a rookie, interrupted. "Hey could ya turn that up?"

Shepard turned toward the tv hanging on the wall. Some one was turning up the volume as the news anchor was introducing a story that had gained international attention. Shepard was about to turn away when a familiar face appeared on screen. Standing next to the field reporter was a tall, dark haired man.

Shepard was transfixed, but it was when the man spoke that Shepard world stopped. His voice had changed, gotten deeper, but there was no mistaking it. On the news in the police station in Aquila Arkansas was Shepard's dead husband, Kaidan Alenko.

Shepard felt eyes on him. Only those who knew him for many years, was looking at him. Including his father. And each person had an expression that ranged from sad to worried.

"Shepard," Anderson's voice boomed, "can I see you for a moment?"

Shepard walked into Anderson's office aware of the questioning whispers. Anderson shut the door as Shepard sat. After closing the blinds Anderson sat next to him.

"Are you okay, son?" He asked.

"No." Shepard replied.

"Wanna talk about it?" Neither Anderson or Shepard liked talking about their feelings, but Anderson had every right to be worried. His son was sitting in a rock hard chair, white as a sheet looking as if he was going to break down and cry or pass out.

Shepard didn't say anything, but loosened his the and unbuttoned his shirt. Anderson sprung into action, half walking half carrying Shepard to the couch so he could lay down.

Anderson bought the couch so he had some place to sleep during long hard cases. It had been a tough decision on where to put it. He needed it to be somewhere easily accessible but not in the way. It was Shepard who suggested against the wall, but Khalee who said bear the door. It proved to be a wise decision, for it made it easier for Anderson to poke his head out and ask Garrus to bring Shepard a Dr. Pepper from the vending machine.

Garrus came in with the cold beverage and placed it on the pale man's neck. In a matter of moments Shepard's breathing went from shallow to deep, steady breaths. Garrus waited till Shepard opened his eyes before removing the can. Anderson remained by the couch, unsure what to do with his hands.

Slowly Shepard sat up. Garrus sat down on the couch, setting the pop on the table. Shepard put his shirt back on and tie. No one said anything for a while, letting the days revelation sink in.

"What should I do?" Shepard asked, his voice hoarse.

"Go home. Rest. I'll pick up the kids from school and drop them off. Just take it easy." Anderson said.

Shepard drew a deep breath and stood up. He nodded and left the room without a word. He left the station without a word. It was only when he was in the safety of his car did he speak.

"What now?" Shepard asked. His voice was barely a whisper. He sat in his car thinking about it before he decided to go home. He began to shake as he drove. Unsure what to do he got himself a smoke, lighting it without taking his eyes off the road. He decided to take the back roads, hoping they would cal his nerves.

He was semi-right. The narrow road lined with trees on both sides gave him an enclosed, but safe, feeling. The air, though cool, was clean and seemed to cut through the mental fog he was having. The fog was memories, happy memories long turned bitter-sweet. Instead of memories he needed to think of what to do now.

 ****  
The house was empty when he got home, but that was to be expected. The silence of the house was loud and unsettling. Shepard, feeling the need to talk to someone called the first person who came to mind, Samara.

Samara had been his teacher in high school, one that he found he could easily talk to. She listened to Shepard and rarely told him what to do. Instead of speaking to him like he was a child, she spoke to him like the adult he was soon going to be.

That is why Shepard found himself with the receiver pressed to his ear, listening to the phone ring. It seemed like forever before she answered. Once she did Shepard found himself a little uncomfortable. Not because he was regretting the call, but he was regretting disturbing her.

"Hello?" Her voice was as calm as Shepard remembered it was.

"Hey Samara. It's me. Uh-Desmond Shepard."

"Ah, Desmond. How are you?"

"I'm not doing so well." He sighed. "I saw a news broadcast this morning. One with Kaidan in it. H-he's alive Samara. I don't know what to do."

Samara was silent for a second, taking the time to carefully craft her response. When she spoke her voice was both hard and calm. "I think that you should talk to him. It will eat you alive if you don't."

"But do I do it now?" The urgency and confusion from his voice was almost tangible.

"That is for you to decide." He knew she was right. "In the meantime you should try to do something to bring your spirits up. Blogging perhaps."

"How would blogging help?" His tone became bitter.

" You could blog about your day, things that aggravate you or even your hobbies. I've got to go Desmond. It was nice talking to you."

" You too." Shepard said meekly. They said their goodbyes and hung up.


End file.
